Saturday, August 30, 2014

Court Date

I had been carrying my phone with me for about a week and half, waiting for THE phone call.  Well, at recess yesterday, I checked my phone and there WAS a voicemail we had been awaiting!  I asked my fifth grade team to watch my class while I called Bethany back.

Upon calling them back, nervously because I wasn't sure if it was regarding a court date or a problem, I was given a COURT DATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!! So, we get to MEET Lincoln  on Monday, October 13 and again on Wednesday, October 15.  Then we go to the court and meet with a judge on Friday, October 17 .   Then anti-climatically, we return home probably the next day, just the two of us.

After we return home, we will be given another date to go back and this time to get custody.  Bethany thinks it will be within a month from the time we return from Korea, which should be around mid-November.  So, either for Thanksgiving or the latest his 3rd birthday, Lincoln will be HOME!

Although October 17 is later than what we had expected or were hoping for, but everything else had been late in our process.  So it wouldn't have made sense for this part to be expedited.  And so, we are pleased with this date.

Then I proceeded to scream the court date to my teammates who were nervously and excitedly waiting for my response.  They were all so sweet as they immediately started asking me when they should hold a baby shower for me.  They also asked me what I needed.  I had also tried calling Chris but he was busy with a patient.  That's I called his office, Sweet Life Chiropractic, and screamed on the phone when my sister Jina picked up the phone.  She first thought something was wrong, but once she realized what I was saying, she was OVERJOYED!!!!

In the last few weeks, we had been slowly getting ready to welcome Lincoln.  We went to a few consignment shops and purchased some clothes and we think he has enough clothes for now.  There were so many cute things.  We also bought some toys while we were there.  So, wardrobe. CHECK! Btw, I am ALL about recycling clothes, better for the environment and there are less harmful chemicals on the body as these clothes/toys have been well worn and washed.

In addition, good friends, Gina and Randy, gave us their son's toys, who went away to college a few weeks ago.  As Lincoln LOVES cars, he wouldn't know what to do with 75 hot wheels and 11 airplanes, and some Lego cars.  Here is the display Chris has made on our breakfast table!  I am sure this was his childhood dream as well.



A few years ago, another set of friends, Jessica and James, gave us their son's car seat as he got older and wanted to get a different one.  So, we've had a car seat waiting for Lincoln for a couple of years now.  Then my friend Brooke, a fellow teacher, gave me all of her kids puzzles as I also love puzzles.  Along the way, my students' parents gave me books and clothes for Lincoln.  Also, my friend Nancy taught me how to knit and I knitted a blanket for Lincoln which he's had for over a year. We had also asked Will, Charmaine, Annie, Susan, Gail, and Pastor Duane to write reference letters for us, a few times for some.  Our friend Mihali had to write medical letters for us 4 times!  My co-worker Cheryl and friend Dennis notarized all our documents.  Then for Lincoln's first birthday, my fifth grade teammates threw Lincoln a first birthday party with many precious gifts.  Some were sent to Korea and he's enjoyed them for the last year and half, and some are waiting at home.  My brother gave subscription to "Parents" magazine while waiting to prepare ourselves.  These are just to name a FEW people and their contributions along the way!  (I know I am leaving many others out.  I am so sorry!!!  I am just so excited to write this post and can't think straight.  Sorry!)

When I felt like God was not listening to my prayers, He was actually listening.  God was NEVER absent during the last 4 years.  What I failed to realize was that He was ever so present as He surrounded us with His wonderful people: many became His mouth piece with encouraging and kind words asking about Lincoln and some too afraid to ask because they didn't want to bother us; some giving us their child(dren)'s outgrown possessions; many got angry or even IRATE at the adoption process and many cried with us as we jumped through some difficult hoops; MANY have told how what great parents we will make; some gave generously toward our adoption expenses not necessarily because they are wealthy, but because they love us and want to see this little boy come home; etc., etc.

When I recall ALL of these experiences and more, how could I have considered that God had abandoned us????  When we couldn't get pregnant and reluctantly decided to adopt, when our paperwork took much longer than expected, when we were asked to update paperwork again and again, when we redid fingerprinting about 7 times altogether, with every step, many people were available not only to hear us vent, but to cry with us, to ache and hurt with us, to love on this little boy that they have no reason to love other than they love us.  How could I doubt God's love for us???  When I felt like I was being a terrible witness for the Lord because I was complaining, many gave me permission to be honest and just vent and express myself.  Lastly and MOST importantly, we had family, friends, co-workers, and patients praying for us and lifting us up from ALL OVER THE WORLD!!!  For a fact, those prayers carried us through especially the last two tough years.  Lincoln, Chris, and I were covered THICK in prayers.  Without any exaggeration, I know I couldn't have walked this path without all the support we've had from the people whom God had placed in our lives.  How could I have been so blinded!?!?!'

As we near the end, my heart overflows, bursts at seams, with gratitude for His abundant loving kindness and mercy.  I know that He will carry us through as we travel to Korea (twice), and as Lincoln comes home and starts grieving process for his loss and transitions into his new, FOREVER family.  God will not stop being who He is!  We are beyond a shadow of doubt blessed to witness God's love through so many, many people, near and far.  I wonder how many people in the world actually experience this kind of unfathomable love by our Heavenly Father.  We are TRULY, TRULY blessed in this journey as we wait for Little Lee with amazing family and friends!


Sunday, August 10, 2014

THE FINAL CHAPTER

On May 20, 2010, after many failed attempts at becoming pregnant, we nervously and cautiously embarked on an adoption journey when we attended a Bethany orientation meeting.  Then after long, trying 4 years and 1 month, we began the final phase which is comprised mainly of three parts: EP submission, Court date, and Embassy date.  So, on June 5, at last our case was submitted to the Ministry of Health and Welfare in Korea.  Then we began waiting anxiously yet again.  However, Emigrant Permit (EP) was finally approved  this week (8/6/14). God must have heard all our family's and friends' prayers!

Then typically, it takes another 2 - 3 weeks for submission to the Court for a court date.  However, we were unexpectedly submitted to the Court the very next day (8/7/14)!!!  We were overjoyed when we got the news because it implied that we were going somewhere.  It was the beginning of the end.  I then called our agency and found out that in 4 - 6 weeks, we should be going to Korea for visit #1 for about 7 - 10 days.  In 4 - 6 weeks!!!!!!  During that visit, we go to the Court for an interview with a judge who has a final say in whether we are fit parents for Lincoln or not.  We will need MAJOR prayers for this!  However, during this visit, we also get to see Lincoln TWICE at the Holt office.  We get to meet him, love on him, and take LOTS of pictures.  However, at the end of that trip, unfortunately, we return home WITHOUT him! :(

FINALLY, the last part of the final phase will be in 4 - 6 weeks after we arrive home when we receive an Embassy date.  At that time, we return to Korea for visit #2 , get CUSTODY of Lincoln (YAY!!!!!), go to Embassy for a Visa interview, which I hear is pretty laid back, and pick up Lincoln's Visa the next day.  At the end of this trip, we do return home WITH him for good!!!  If everything goes smoothly, Lincoln should be home before he turns three (12/13)!!! 

Today, as I was worshiping at North Point, I was so very comforted and blessed by this song.  Every time I sing this song, I usually become a basket-case and this time was no different.

"Oceans" By Hillsong

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand


And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine


Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed and You won't start now

 

So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

 

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
 

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander  
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

 

I will call upon Your name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in Your embrace

I am Yours and You are mine

Many times in the last several years, struggling through infertility and then this arduous and stressful adoption process, I felt that God had called me to walk upon some deep tumultuous waters.  Often, I was surrounded by fear and doubt.  I felt as though God had failed me and abandoned me.  However, His grace, His sovereign hand had never failed me.  Instead He reminded me that if He has not failed for the last thousands of years since the world began, then He does not plan to start now with ME or Lincoln. 

This last chapter is not completed yet.  It continues to be written.  However, when this adoption is finished, I hope that we can look back and confidently and joyfully celebrate our journey knowing that our faith was made STRONGER and that our trust was without borders. Until then, we will continue to rest in His embrace for we are His and He is ours.